How long should you date before getting married?
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In a Whatsapp chat group, there was a story about a lady who dated a guy for over ten years and then he left her for someone else. People’s responses were generally that they dated for too long. Ten years was such a long time.
Early this year, the story of a Lagos socialite who met and married a man all under a year went viral when news broke that the marriage has hit the rocks less than 10 months after the flamboyant wedding. People blamed the marriage failure on lack of enough time to get to know each other.
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This begs the question: How long should one date before getting married? LifeXtra sought people’s opinion and this is what they have to say.
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Kubura Musa, an entrepreneur, said a year is enough to court someone before marriage. She said one year is practical enough to allow one evaluate whether the partner is a strong match for the long run.
Kubura said she always worries when young couples brag about their long years of engagement.
“I feel a year is ideal for a relationship. In that one year, the couple should know if they are compatible for one another or not. Prolonging relationships without any serious reason only tells that the couple doesn’t know what they are doing or what they want,” she said.
Hauwa Katung believes between six months to a year of getting to know each other also provides the couple with ample opportunity to have important conversations about their future “but many forget to ask serious questions during that period and concentrate on ‘I love you, I cannot live without you’.”
Hauwa, who is a house wife, said she suffered such because the basic questions about her likes and her future ambition were not discussed and when she got married her husband insisted she will not work which she tried to object to but “he insisted and that’s why I am a housewife.”
She reiterated that a period of six months to a year is enough for couples to be able to know those answers to the deep rooted questions about themselves and their partners, adding that if they choose to ignore them now, they may come up later when it might be too late.
Umar Shehu, a student, says it depends on how the level of communication with the significant other progresses. He explained the time should be measured based on how well they know one another and not based on how long.
“Some are not comfortable giving out confidential details about themselves until they have studied that person and his character over a certain time. You know how deceptive people are and when you now bare your heart out to them and at the end of the day the person says they are not doing, that would be hurtful,” he said.
“So, I think as long as you feel ready and comfortable with the person, if it takes you two years, or three months to do that I think it is fine,” he added.

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Relationship

Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man

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Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Broken Relationship

9 Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man

Most guys after spending some quantity time awhile with a lady tends to get carried away hence taking things for granted. Sadly, this behaviour  is done consciously and subconsciously. Alot of things can make a lady fall out of love with a guy. And until you as a man changes and do better,  getting dumped for some other guy won’t be far fetched.  This article  shares 9 reasons why she is going to leave you for another man and how to prevent that from occurring.

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9. Not being honest with her

25 Things Men Does When They Hate the Relationship They are In Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man 25 Things Men Does When They Hate the Relationship They are In

Are you totally honest with your partner or are there things not yet disclosed? Lying is human nature, we know but speaking the truth is a necessity especially if you want the relationship to last . You are probably lying to her a lot and women being women, she has been catching you off-guard. Honesty is actually a keystone in sustaining a relationship. If you aren’t conscientious, be ready to face the music.

8. She is NOT problem-free!

not honest Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man not honest

She is definitely not problem-free and feels the need to be looked after, and one of the best way to do that is to listen to her and become her support system.  Most of the times when we develop an emotional bonding with our queens, we take it as a one-way thing. We highly expect our lovers to listen to us, and us only. But if we give it a deep thought, isn’t it too selfish of us? It’s a truth well acknowledged that women know every problem that their men are facing, but are we aware of what they are going through every single day.

7. Giving her time

Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man He understands that you can have  E2 80 98off E2 80 99 days

Nobody is ever to busy, everything boils down to priorities. If you love a woman, show it to her by making time in spite your busy schedules. Yes, We all have some tasks in our daily lives; we rush to our jobs and work, work, work. That’s everyone’s story now a days. It definitely doesn’t mean you take zero time for people you love and care about; that’s impossible. If your excuse is you don’t have enough time, she will make sure she finds someone who has time for her and puts her in his priority list.

6. You make her bored

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According to nairaland, Relationship is constantly about including sparks, isn’t it? Indeed, even you don’t care for exhausting individuals or things. All in all, in the event that you yourself end up plainly unsurprising, what’s the delight for her to remain with you?

5. Are you getting too possessive?

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It can make your relationship the best one in the world and even ruin it for a lifetime. Over possessiveness creates a claustrophobic effect in the relationship, which is not healthy at all. She probably have been feeling suffocated and anchored in the relationship, and might choose to set herself free very soon. Stop that.

4. Repeated Change in Moods

future Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man future

Mood swings are a part of everyone’s personality but if it becomes excessive, it can cause a lot of trouble in a person’s personal life and affect different relationships; same goes for one’s romantic relationship. If it continues, she might lose her patience with you and choose someone who would give her more smiles than frowns. Whining and complaining is understandable the first few times, not all the time and so having frequent mood swings should be treated by an expert immediately.

3. You get too serious for her liking

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This particular personality is called “The Robotic Personality.” And as the name suggests, your girl would want to date a real, talkative human being than a robot, isn’t it? Sometime, the men in the society act too serious with their lovers; it’s good sometimes but would be a nightmare if it happens all the time. Take a break from your hectic schedule, take her out on a trip or a romantic candle light dinner. Be jolly, be fun-loving and make her laugh often – she deserves it and so do you!

2. Critical enough?

Positive criticism is good but it’s not fun if done every time. It can make her feel insecure about herself which may lead her to go through severe depression and lowered self-esteem.

Image result for 2. Critical enough? Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Part 202 20Reason

There sure is a thin line between being positively critical or judgemental about something or someone. By the end of the day, if she’s not happy and confident around you, she would not have a good reason to stay.

1. Emotional Bond

Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man Reasons Why She Is Going To Leave You For Another Man He lets you be  E2 80 98you E2 80 99

A relationship is a blend of intimacy and emotional attachment. If you are not open about yourself or your problems to her, she might feel you don’t want her to interfere in your life or that you are not permitting her to be a part of your world.

What are your thoughts on this? Kindly leave a comment and don’t forget to share

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Relationship

Things To Note While Going On A Date

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Things To Note While Going On A Date Things To Note While Going On A Date Couple Cheating

5 Things To Note While Going On A Date

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Thinking about going on that date? You are wondering what you should do or not do because you do not want to spoil your reputation with that man/woman, here are some tips on what you should never do on a date:

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Avoid lateness

As humans, being late to any outing shows we don’t take the party serious. Punctuality is always important, especially on the first date. If you show up late, it will send the message that you just don’t care. Reduce your chances of a late arrival by departing earlier than usual. Being late says a lot about your personality.

Dress smartly

If you show up looking a mess, it shows that you don’t care about yourself, hence, you can’t care about another person.  If you really couldn’t care less, just cancel the date and stay home. Don’t ask someone out just to pass the time or because you’re lonely.

Don’t be Argumentative

State your opinions as clear as possible, don’t get into an unnecessary argument, it makes you look unintelligent. You’ll be better off by sticking with some lighter topics. If you make it past the first couple of dates and start seeing each other regularly, there will be plenty of time for arguing, if that’s your thing. Be polite and respect your date’s opinion.

Don’t invite your friends

Date is an avenue to get to know the other person, taking your friends along is a bad move. Save the group outings for later on in your relationship.

Don’t discuss your life

You should not discuss your whole life story in a date. You can do that subsequently when you get to know each other. Pouring out your life details will bore the other party out. Keep the conversation fun and light. In addition, your date will think that if you’re ready to share everything upfront you do that with everyone you meet.

What other tips do you know? Share in the comment section.

 

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